


Phan is not on fire

by superwholockatthechemicalboy



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Angst, Eventual Smut, Fluff, M/M, Triggers, YouTube
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:42:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889421
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/superwholockatthechemicalboy/pseuds/superwholockatthechemicalboy
Summary: Dan and Phil were having a regular day when Phil suddenly does something that changes them forever.





	1. Dan and Phil GAMES

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic so please be gentle with me but some feedback is always good :)

Dan was annoyed. He had been waiting for Phil to come home for an hour. They were meant to make their video together at 3pm and it was already quarter past 4. He had the game set up, they were going to play Sims 4 again. Plus he had downloaded a new expansion pack that he couldn’t wait to show Phil.

Suddenly Phil came clattering in through their front door, wet from the pouring rain outside that England seemed cursed with. He shook off his umbrella and walked up the stairs to see a very disappointed Dan waiting there.

“Late Phil!” he yelled, “You were meant to be here an hour ago! Where have you been?”

“Sorry Danny,” said Phil sheepishly, “There was this old woman at Tesco’s and she asked if I could help her carry her bags to her car. Then she asked me for directions to the coffee shop, you know, the expensive one way over on the other side of town which took ages to explain. Then in a rush I started coming back home and I realised I forgot to buy milk which was the one thing you said we needed so then I went back and ran into Chris and PJ so I had a chat with them and forgot all about it. Sorry.”

“Yeah ok I get it, you were being a kind generous person and all but I was waiting for an hour!”

“Well let’s go record it now then,” said Phil

They walked up to their gaming room and sat down in their chairs. Dan turned the camera on and began the intro.

“Hello and welcome Dan and Phil Games Simulations” began Phil.

“Yes today we are playing the Sims 4 again but I went a bit wild and bought an expansion pack!” said Dan.

Phil turned the camera off. Dan looked at him confusedly.

"Dan we've been doing Sims 4 for ages now. Its losing its excitement. I know we had planned to do this but can't we do something else?"

"Phil, what has gotten into you? Last week you said you loved playing Sims 4. That you wanted to do more. And I've gone and bought an expansion pack with my own money. And you don't even want to play now? I can't believe you Phil. You make me wait for an hour then you get here and decide you don't want to do it. I just can't believe you Phil. Talk to me later when you've got some sense knocked into you and you're not acting like a self-obsessed idiot!"

And with that, Dan stormed out of the room and into his bedroom where he slammed the door shut. Phil knew talking to him now would only make him angrier so he decided it was best to leave Dan alone until his mood improved. Suddenly, Phil felt very ill. He felt awful. He wasn't sure why he felt this way, but a feeling was growing inside his stomach that made him want to cry. He walked into their living room and plonked himself down on the couch where Dan usually sat. Tears welled up in his eyes and he couldn't help himself. Phil began to cry quietly. He just couldn't stop, so overwhelmed with grief and he didn't know why. He felt like by making Dan angry he was losing him. He began to realise that Dan was special to him to the point where he couldn't function without him. 

 

\---

 

Dan was sitting in his room, fuming. How dare Phil be like this. He grabbed his laptop and tried to find some harmless video to watch while he waited for Phil to come in and bring a cup of tea in apology. When it dawned on him that Phil wasn't coming, he stopped to think. If he was honest with himself, Phil wasn't at fault. He was just expressing his opinion. Dan was ashamed at himself. He walked out of his room to go make Phil a cup of tea instead, expecting to hear the TV on, or some video game noise from the gaming room. The silence was strange. He wandered around the kitchen wondering where Phil could possibly be. 'Probably out with Chris or PJ...' he thought. He stopped making the tea. He checked his phone but no texts. He wandered into their living room and dropped his phone. It clattered on the ground but he didn't care. The sight of Phil curled up on the couch in tears was an alarm bell for Dan. He ran over and pulled Phil into his arms. 

"Phil, Phil!"

"I'm so sorry Dan," whispered Phil in between sobs.

"No shhhhh," said Dan, "it's not your fault, you didn't do anything. Oh Phil..."

Phil shivered in Dan's arms. Dan pulled him close.

"Phil what is going on? I've been angry at you before, why are you like this?" said Dan worriedly. 

"I... I thought... that you... you were mad at me... and... and... that you wouldn't..." Phil stuttered. 

Dan whispered, "No, no Phil, I'm not mad. Please stop crying. It's all ok now."

Phil's breathing became regular and he stopped crying. Dan took a deep breath.

"Yo fer" squeaked Phil. 

Dan looked at him questioningly. Phil cleared his throat.

"Your phone," said Phil.

Dan laughed and picked his phone up off the ground.

"Thanks Phil" he said and walked into the kitchen.

"Hey Dan, do you want to make the Sims video now then?"

"What, after all this that its caused? No thanks Philly."

Phil got up off the couch and made his way into the kitchen. He felt better now but there was just something not quite right still. But it was a problem for another day.


	2. Phils YouNow and the truth...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan catches a glimpse of Phil's YouNow chat and asks Phil for answers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think the perspective changes a bit so I'm sorry. Any feedback is definitely welcome xx

Almost a week had passed since Phil's strange breakdown. Phil tried to act like it didn't happen but he knew he couldn't do it forever. Dan on the other hand was intrigued by this change in his best friend and was determined to work out what had caused him to snap like that. Dan opened his laptop and brought up YouNow, his favourite live streaming website. He noticed that Phil was online from another room. This was weird for Dan, as they usually were aware of each other's live streams. He clicked on it, wondering what Phil was talking about, knowing that if their fans were watching Phil, they wouldn't watch him. 

"So what do you think I should do?" asked Phil.

Dan watched the chat bar fill with suggestions. He had no idea what Phil was talking about. 10 thousand people were online watching Phil and telling him what to do. They suggested 'telling Dan' and 'seeing a psychologist' but Phil was acting like those were ridiculous suggestions. Dan suddenly really wanted to know what Phil had asked. Then he glanced at the chat again. 

phandomfeelsplosion12: hey look dan is online watching phils younow

Dan felt his heart stop. Soon the chat was full of people announcing that he was online. He closed the tab on his computer and ran out of his room, hoping Phil wouldn't notice. He walked to Phil's bedroom and knocked on the door. When he still heard Phil talking to the live stream, he entered. 

"Hey Phil," he said casually.

"Oh hi Dan," said Phil.

"Hey are you live streaming? Why didn't you tell me?" asked Dan as innocently as he could.

"Oh, no, I just wanted to hop on for a minute and ask the fans a few questions," said Phil, whose heart was racing now.

"Oh cool, you don't mind if I stick around for them then?" asked Dan, determined to find out what was going on.

"Actually, I was just logging off," said Phil. 

But one glance at the chat told Dan that this was a lie, with everyone saying 'tell him, tell him!' 

"What is this Phil?" asked Dan, "What are you going to tell me?"

"Nothing Dan, I'm logging off. It's not about you. Get out of my room!" said Phil angrily. 

Why wouldn't Dan leave him alone? Why couldn't Dan take a hint? Phil logged off YouNow and shut his laptop. He walked out of his room to the kitchen. The cool tiles of the floor calmed him down and he decided he would explain himself to Dan. However when he walked to the bench he noticed a post-it note.

_"Phil, I'm sorry I came into your room. I've gone into the city for a bit. I'll bring back dinner for both of us. Dan."_

Phil was confused. Dan hated public transport, hated the city, hated being out in public in general. Maybe he had scared Dan away. But now he was scared for Dan. He picked up his phone and dialled Dan's number. Dan's phone rang in his pocket. He answered and heard a stressed Phil on the other side.

"Dan, is that you?" asked Phil

"You called me didn't you? Of course it's me you spork."

Phil breathed relief at the sound of Dan's voice. 

"Why did you go out?" asked Phil.

"I thought it was best if I got out of the house for a bit. You've been acting strangely Phil and it's weird ok? So I went to Louise's house to see if she'd spoken to you recently. But she didn't know so I was going to go visit PJ. Unless you care to explain now." 

"Um. Ok. I can try and tell you maybe." said Phil, whose voice had gone very small.

Dan ended the call. He was just so confused. He opened the door of their apartment and walked up the stairs. He saw Phil sitting in the living room. He dumped his stuff in his room and went out to Phil.

 

\---

 

Dan sat in his regular sofa crease, trying to get comfortable but he was too nervous. He felt like a contestant on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, like this was some test and he could win or lose depending on how he reacted. An awkward silence hung in the air and Phil decided to break it.

"The question." said Phil.

"The what?" replied Dan.

"The YouNow question, I can't tell you."

"Phil! That's why I came home so fast! You have to tell me something."

"Yeah, I will. But you have to promise not to ask what I asked the people on YouNow."

"Ok fine. But I feel like an idiot who doesn't know anything. So  _please_ explain something."

Dan noticed Phil's hands twisting nervously in his lap. 

"Dan, I hope you know that this isn't easy for me to say, being your best friend and all. So please, don't say anything. Let me finish, then I'll go pack my bags and you can find a new house mate or something." said Phil, who was finding it hard to breathe regularly due to the butterflies going haywire in his stomach.

"Phil..."

"No, shush Danny. Listen. The other day, when you got mad, I got really worried. I don't really understand, even now. But I began to think that I need you. No, don't interrupt me," said Phil shakily, "I like you Dan. I thought it was just you know, friendly. Until I thought I might lose you. Now I know that I love you way too much. You are my best friend and yet I feel more. I know it's ironic, what with all the fan fiction and shipping but I guess I kind of believe it. And Dan, you are too special for me to have you. Plus, I'm pretty sure you're not gay. But now that you know this, we can't continue our lives the way we used to. So I'll go find you a new flat mate or whatever. But this is goodbye."

Phil stood up and began to make his way out the door.

"What?"

"Dan I literally just poured out my soul for you. And you say 'what!' Let me go please."

"No," interjected Dan, "You can't just leave!"

"Yes I can," said Phil, whose voice was now shaking,"Dan you don't like me the way I like you. Ok? That's why I have to go now. Or stay here where I'll never be able to talk to you like a normal person again."

"Phil. Stop. Listen. You are better than this. And you're still my best friend. I don't want you to go. Please." pleaded Dan. 

"Dan you make this hard for me. I don't want to leave..."

'Then don't!"

"You don't understand Dan! I love you. Like love, love. I don't want to be friends I want to be lovers. And I don't want to lose you but it's better to leave you than stay wanting something I can't have for eternity."

"Phil for fuck's sake. Don't go."

Phil sat back down and held his face in his hands. Dan sidled up to Phil and put an arm around him. 

"Regardless of what you think of me Phil, you're still my best friend and I'm not going to let you go that easily." said Dan.

Phil looked up at Dan, unsure how to react. 

"Ask me out on a date. Tell me I look nice and maybe I'll fall in love with you. Maybe I won't but it's a risk you'll have to take because there is no way I'm going to let you go like this." suggested Dan.

Phil smiled. Yes. This is why he had fallen in love with his best friend. 

 

\---

 

2 days later Dan was sitting at their dining room table with the multicoloured chairs. His phone pinged. It was a text from Phil.

_hi dan so how about that date 5pm meet me at the cinema (the one where we saw avatar) dont bring anything ill pay for u xx_

Dan packed himself a backpack and walked out the front door. He was on his way to dinner with his best friend Phil Lester and little did he know, he was going to enjoy it a lot more than he imagined...

 


End file.
